Freitag, 28. Dezember 2012

the perks of being different.

those recent nights this girl has been wide awake accompanied by insomnia. i must say i don't welcome it's company but it gives me time and space to think and create.
i created my very first song in my head in a night of insomnia, wrote it down and played it the next day, so insomnia isn't all bad for me.

one of the things i was thinking was about 'being different'.
i grew up in a small town in a society where everybody is the same. they do the same stuff, wear the same clothes, have the same opinions, take the same classes at university...
i always felt there was a fear of speaking up. speaking your mind. questioning things. being yourself.
because if you do that, people will shut you out.
nobody wants to be an outsider, right?
but for some reason i don't understand why most people give up who they are, in order to fit in. in order to be 'loved' (heads up: if people don´t love you for nothing but yourself they won't love you for someone who you pretend to be).

but here we are.
we are the people that are so different that they can't help but being it. can't help but wanting to be different!
i couldn't betray who i am to fit in where i clearly didn't belong.
when i was a child, i was desperate over what was wrong with me.
why i was so different than them, why i didn't even want to be like them.
i felt wrong, oh so wrong.

but as i grew up a little, thought about things, questioned things i got to know the perks of being different.

we are the rarity.
we are the wild ones.
we are the ones with strong hearts and minds.
we must embrace it!

i found that there is a wisdom i developed, i was only able to receive by questioning and doing things other people thought where 'not normal', 'reckless', 'careless', 'not-like-a-grown-up-should-act'.
i found there is a wisdom you only receive by experience.
and with this i am not saying i have aaall the wisdom.
no, i have worked for the small part of the whole i have gained yet.yet yet yet.

i found that there is poise and self-confidence building up in me more and more by being me.

i found that there is more room for new. 
to create new things. to have new ideas. to have new challenges.

i found that one day i will be irreplaceable, because i am different.

i found that i can write how i do, that i can sing how i do, that i can think how i do.
i can dance how i do, even in a subway station or on the sidewalk. i can live freely. 
i can be amazed by the smallest things on earth and i can be the child i am in my heart. 
i can travel the whole wide world and i can meet new people without judging them or laughing at them, because they are different than i am, want them to or expect them to be.
i can tell everyone about my crazy dreams, no matter if daydream or night. 
i can laugh about the most stupid stuff and be the really crazy one i am.
i can wear heels as high as i want them to be.
i can experience. 
i can make stupid jokes and be wild. 
i can sometimes be careless and reckless. 
i can cry during beautiful sunrises at bondi beach or out of wanderlust.
i can ramble over and over because i am so motivated, impressed or full of love.
i can thrill people when i am keen.
i can sometimes wander. 
i can speak my mind. i can dream.
i can be me.

don't give up yourself in order to fit in.
fitting in is overrated.







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Sonntag, 23. Dezember 2012

hallelujah.



my latest cover on youtube.








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Mittwoch, 19. Dezember 2012

music i love.





















this is what i listen to lately <3


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